A completely subjective review of Gotham's best pleasure palaces
It's hard to say that one gentlemen's club is better than another. Taking into account the many variables such as who's dancing where and when; the staff that day; the clientele, etc., makes it seem nearly impossible. They all offer something different, from location, to girls, to music played and food served, that is, if they serve food at all. The Sisyphean task was to review all of these clubs and come up with a ranking of sorts. So use this list like a road map for your own personal pleasure trips. Just remember, your individual mileage may vary.
Plan to venture out like a tomcat on the prowl, leaving the house only at night. Visiting Manhattan's finest clubs, you'll find that aside from the standard twenty dollar cover, they are all surprisingly busy, friendly places. So without further delay, here's the travelogue of the Manhattan gentlemen's club landscape, from top to bottomless.
Topless Clubs (booze included):
Penthouse Executive Club
603 West 45th Street at 11th Ave
212-245-0002
penthouseexecutiveclub.com/main.htm
This is a first-class club. Walking into the large main room, one sees a number of topless girls sitting on the laps of gentlemen and pouring liquor down their throats. Others were getting the double-down treatment; lap dances with a second girl massaging their necks. What a cool vibe. The scene is similar to ancient Roman times where women hand-fed grapes to the surrounding gentlemen. The interior design is stylish in a Las-Vegas-club kind of way. The main stage has 4 satellite stages, plus a smoke machine.
Robert's Steakhouse restaurant on the second floor gets packed. If you have a client in town and want to impress them over a drink or dinner, the Executive Club should definitely be on your list. The girls are glamorous and wear elegant dresses, not dancer costumes.
Flashdancers
1674 Broadway at 52nd Street
212-315-5107
flashdancersnyc.com/home.html
Quantity and quality are a sure thing at this hot spot. If you're looking for the most girls per square foot, this medium sized club is your winner! It's as if conveyor belts of hot girls come at you from all directions. There must be at least forty girls from every continent in there. The location can't be beat. Right across from the David Letterman show. They have the only sushi and saki bar of the Manhattan clubs. Three girls dance on stage at once, while other girls dance in the champagne room for those seeking a more intimate vibe.
Scores West Side
536 West 28th Street
212-8684900
scoresny.com
Girls galore! Not jaded dancers, but cool, down to earth sweethearts. Even if you don't want a lapdance, they still sit and talk for a few seconds instead of indifferently walking away. The music may be a bit loud and there's only one girl dancing on stage at a time, but nonetheless this spot is hot. It's even pleasantly packed with couples hanging out–more than most other places. The girls that come with the guys tend to be hot, too. It's possible to even see someone's grandma. Swear to god. The floor is filled with guys getting lapdances while others are getting their necks worked.
VIP Club
20 West 20th Street
212-633-1199
This is a very cool rock-and-roll strip club in the Union Square area. This spot offers hot girls in a well designed, classy club atmosphere. The girls exit the stage by a cool looking staircase that leads to somewhere mysterious. The stage is the sexiest of any club. There's brilliant lighting and a wind machine that allows dancers to blow their hair around seductively as they dance. It looks great. More than a few couples in there were bobbing their heads to the classic rock soundtrack.
Hustler
641 West 51st Street
212-247-2460
main.hustlerclubs.com/c.asp?c=18462
This place is bachelor party central. There are so many of them that there's hardly room for other customers to sit down. This place is packed. There is a main stage and another two stages which hang over the main floor where Hustler Honeys do a superb job shaking their money makers. There are other sexy girls milling around, but not nearly enough of them to supply this big demand. The smell of the Hudson River just across the west side highway from this club is bizarrely refreshing…
Scores East Side
333 East 60th Street
212-421-3600
scoresny.com
If you live on the far east side of town there's no need to head west. When you first walk in to this medium sized club you're offered a cigar menu then ushered onto the main floor. If you sit at the bar you can watch the girls stream out of the dressing room. Guys are getting lapdances and neck massages all over the place here. When you walk into the restaurant there's pretty girls eating dinner or having drinks with the customers. Girls from Latvia and other distant countries abound. The one girl on stage is always a sexy dancer, with gyrations and moves that stand out from dancers seen at other clubs. This spot is a must-see.
Privilege
565 West 23rd Street
212-243-6888
privilegeny.com
You can't help but admire the hot Dodge Vipers and Mercedes parked outside this club. Inside there's an excellent selection of hot ladies too, all makes and models. For fans of Asian girls, this is your spot. Lapdances are happening all over the club; on the main floor, in the lounge, and in the beautiful fin de siècle style bar next door. This place has one of the most laid back, cool vibes you can find. If you need to take clients or friends out for some drinks, consider Privilege.
Private Eyes
320 West 45th Street
212-582-4001
gogodance.com/index.cfm?Cat=0,35,53
This is a more subdued spot in Hell's Kitchen with old school lights surrounding the stage. The watchword here is quality, not quantity. Lapdances are performed on a long row of banquets. This makes for some crazy voyeuristic action going on around you. Imagine you're on a subway to heaven…
Legz Diamond
622 West 47th Street
212-977-3200
legzdiamonds.ypguides.net
This spot is smaller and more intimate, but still jumpin'. They have excellent lighting and a nice eclectic group of girls to choose from. There were lots of hot white girls, delicious black girls and several cute Latinas. If you're on the far west side, stroll over to Legz. It's a very chill club. They might even have the Mets game on.
Tens
35 East 21st Street
212-254-2444
Another good club near Union Square with a beautiful bar. Up the stairs and you're in the fun house. The dancer on stage is surrounded by tables of happy guys getting lapdances from an assortment of good looking girls. The sound system bumps good hip-hop music. Basically it's a cool spot with cool management.
New York Dolls
59 Murray Street
212-791-5261
nydollsclub.com
The best spot below Canal Street. There's not too many left down there. The nice long bar where you walk in gives way to a main room where two girls dance on one shelf-like stage, and lapdances happen on the long benches lining the walls. If you're near Tribeca and want to have a drink with twenty good looking girls, this is the place. Most have real breasts too, which can be refreshing. NY Dolls is a cool, small spot.
Lace
725 7TH Avenue at 48th Street
212-840-9139
laceclubs.com
Right in the heart of midtown, this club is one of the few holdouts in these parts. It offers two stages with good looking girls, couples, tourists, you name it. The place was packed! It's quite the adventure, with everyone having a good time. As an added bonus, drink prices are reasonable.
Bare Elegance
216 West 50th Street
212-245-3494
This is a small, quaint spot on 50th and Broadway. It is the place for you if you want to get away for a beer during the day and see smokin' hot white and latina ladies. They have the lowest VIP room prices. You can chill in either the dance or bar area, and even shoot a few games of pool if you like. There's two touch-screen video games you can play, also. The informal atmosphere is what really makes this place work.
ALL NUDE (no booze):
Stiletto
689 8th Avenue at 43rd Street
212-765-5047
This all nude show in the heart of Times Square really brings back memories of the good old days. No hooch, just good lighting, good music and bad girls who drop their drawers to the floor. Not the hottest girls out there, nor the most upscale clientele, but if your imagination needs a reality check, this is the place for your pubic fix.
Mystique (formerly Carousel)
75 Clarkson St.
212-627-9404
It's just north of Houston on the West Side Highway, which makes it a bit inconvenient unless you have a car. Another boozeless joint, but the ladies here make it worth the effort. Upon sitting down, the payoff is clear as these girls are truly eager to please, dropping their tops and bottoms. It's a nice club with a great stage and different rooms to explore. They're currently refurbishing the location to be the new club Mystique, but in the meantime it's business as usual.
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